Saturday, August 29, 2009

THE FINAL DESTINATION 3D & THE LINGERING OF THOSE 3D DEMONS

Yes, it appears that I am still unconvinced that 3D will be the future of cinema. Perhaps "the 3D experience" will dominate the future of movie going - as in what generates box office traffic (and adds $3-$4 to each ticket price) - but as far as enhancing the art of cinematography... well, let's just say I'm super skeptical. But, admittedly, my skepticism comes from the view of a fan, not an artisan or technician, so, trust me, I am not coming at this with a pitchfork mentality nor picket sign in hand. I fully acknowledge that there are artists and pioneers working in the 3D arena who have one hundred more times the foresight and knowledge about this art form than I do.

That being said, my nervousness hit a bit of a higher peak this Friday when I saw the Avatar trailer in front of the film that provides half of the title for this post. And no, unlike what other movie fans have been expressing, it wasn't the content of the Avatar trailer that bothered me, it was the way that it looked... with those damned 3D glasses on! My eyes couldn't take in the whole image within the frame because they were naturally focused on the pronounced image that was lifted off the screen. That isn't cinematography, that's just theatrics. I've come to accept the of gimmick of 3D as it relates to animated kids films, horror flicks, and B-movies, but Avatar - to my knowledge - is the first sort of epic, "serious", not totally animated, feature film that is pushing the 3D aesthetic. What I'm saying, is that I don't really wanna see Scorcese's Sinatra or Spielberg's Lincoln in 3D in the years to come.

But until then... I will admit that the entertainment value of watching the latest Final Destination installment was indeed enhanced... by those damned 3D glasses! (And no, not just because there was some full-frontal 3D bouncing boobies. Not just because...)

The Final Destination franchise is a unique one in that its "sequels" are totally free of the tentacles and roots of the previous films. For the most part, each Final Destination movie is a stand alone clean slate production that - after resetting, for any newbies, the hook of the film - simply tries to one-up the inventive kills of the chapter that preceded it. Further, if you consider that FDs 1 & 3 were directed James Wong while FDs 2 & 4 were directed by David Ellis, then you pretty much have a head-to-head killfest competition taking place - every year or so - right in front of your eyes. One doesn't go into a Final Destination film for story (they're all the same... ending and all).

However, I feel the need to applaud the Final Destination series for containing a fear element that - to my knowledge - has otherwise gone untapped in the horror genre, and that is the fear of the freak accident. Maybe y'all don't worry and obsess like I do, but I often ponder the horrific chain of events that could happen if I don't pick up that piece of paper that I dropped on the way to my car. If I decide to not get out of my car and retrieve that sheet, a passerby might slip on it, knock over a can of gasoline sitting in the edge of the curb, which will then pour on over to the guys using a blowtorch next door, and ... KABLAMMO!!! I know, what are the odds? Yeah, well that's the kind of stuff that plagues my mind, not some tired, old bogeyman. So, think about what you might have just done the next time you spill a bit of beverage on the floor of your coffee shop as you leave.

The easiest way to review The Final Destination 3D (aka FD4) would be to simply list each death and rate it on a scale of cleverness. However, that may suck the fun out for the few of you who may actually go and see it. I will say that The Final Destination 3D held me less than the previous two, mainly because David Ellis blows his wad in the film's opening sequence and never fully returns to form. Frontloading your fright film with its most elaborate and slamming sequence is ok as long as you don't go limp for the remaining 70 minutes (btw... FD3D is only 82 minutes! That is pretty much the ideal goofball/slasher horror movie length. Cheers to Ellis for that.), and, sadly, that's almost what David Ellis does. In fact, at least one (and maybe two) of the kills is a retread from the first Final Destination. It's my feeling that David Ellis and screenwriter Eric Bress relied on the gimmick of 3D at the disservice of writing more inventive sequences.

Ahh... but as a local theater hear in town annually hosts a 100 Best Movie Kills compilation night, and as Spike TV's 1000 Ways to Die appears to be a success, and as children (of all ages) continue to play the game of "would you rather die by drowning or burning?", the macabre fascination over how, when, and where our personal demise will greet us seems like something that shall always remain. So, expect Final Destination 5 sometime in, or around, 2012. You can bet your life on it.

74 comments:

Jason Bellamy said...

Oh, Foxy! When I saw you'd reviewed this movie my first reaction was, "No way! He did NOT see that!" Although that was immediately followed by, "Wait a minute. Of course he saw it!"

Fox at Tractor Facts ... seeing the utterly stupid movies so we don't have to. (I presume you know that's meant as a genuine compliment.)

Anyway, as usual this made for an entertaining read. Having seen none of these films I don't have anything substantive to add, but I will say this ...

If 3D movies were $4 less than 2D movies (instead of the other way around), I'd still see the 2D movie instead. 3D intrigues me on some level. I'm sure I'll give Avatar a look on 3D, given all that's been put into it. And I do think it's a fun gimmick for kids -- I kind of want to see the upcoming A Christmas Carol in 3D, too. But I've thought that before. And want to know how many of these 3D movies I've actually gotten myself to thus far?

Zero.

JA said...

I loved that Ellis just used every cheap and cheesy 3D trick in the book. Because that is what these movies are about: boiling it down to the easy, cheap and cheesy tricks (Easy cheap and cheesy! I want that on this movie's poster now!). AND I FUCKING LOVE THEM FOR IT.

Fox said...

If 3D movies were $4 less than 2D movies (instead of the other way around), I'd still see the 2D movie instead. 3D intrigues me on some level....

Jason-

Me too. Although, I don't even know if the new Final Destination is even available in 2D. It probably is, as My Bloody Valentine was, but I didn't check.

Since The Final Destination film was kind of a goof, I didn't mind paying an extra $3 for the glasses (and the experience... I saw it with a mildy rowdy high school/college/urban audience, which is a great way to see slasher movies, in my opinion), but ordinarily I would go with 2D. I'm really glad that upcoming stuff like Fantastic Mr. Fox and Where The Wild Things Are aren't coming out in 3D.

Fox said...

I loved that Ellis just used every cheap and cheesy 3D trick in the book....

Totally. I would be lying if I said I didn't flinch multiple times during the car race.

On another note, I liked the set-up of Krista Allen's death, but I wish it would have given us a better payoff.

PIPER said...

I wasn't going to respond to this post, but then I thought if I don't respond to it, then I might use that time for something else. And what if I picked up the phone instead of responding and just as I was on the phone a kid was crossing the street right outside my building and that kid caused a car to swerve and that car hit a truck filled with scissors and those scissors flew out of the truck and cut an electrical line which hit the building and went through the telephone line and then struck me in the ear and fried my brain.

So here I am responding.

But good call on the technique of 3D. It's gimmicky and I think it always will be. Unless of course you're talking about Jaws 3-D, then you're talking masterpiece theater there.

Anonymous said...

For those who say 3D does nothing to improve the story, I agree. But it wasn't meant to. It was meant to enhance the senses, i.e., the moviegoing experience, much like sound, color or widescreen. They never made the story better either and yet survived because they made what you were watching more lifelike. 3D is the next logical step by making it more immersive, like life itself. But it must be used wisely. An occasional "in-your-face" effect is ok. People expect that, especially for horror movies. 3D should provide both behind and in front of the screen effects. Frankly, I don't understand such opposition to it and this constant drumbeat that it adds "nothing". If that's the case, then let's go back to grainy, silent, black & white movies. 3D is here to stay. It's perfected, successful & backed by the big wigs like never before. Besides, there's usually a 2D version available for those who don't want to see it in 3D.

elgringo said...

I'm going to be brutally honest here. FD3D was one of the most fun times I've ever had at the movies. 3-D has come a long way since The Adventures of Sharkboy and Lava Girl. It should also be made clear that I'm horribly biased...I love the first three FD flicks too. Abercromibe people dying in interesting ways, count me in. Make in 3-D, I'll pay however much you're asking.

El Gringo
He-Shot-Cyrus.blogspot.com

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