Wednesday, July 02, 2008


Hey, now I'm just some dude with his wife and his cat in an apartment in Texas, but I at least thought I was hip to the ways suits in Hollywood sell movie ideas to each other... and pamphlets wasn't one that I had in mind.

Yep. Supposedly, one of the ways MGM is trying to attract investors for its projected 2010 remake of Robocop is through one of those fold-y paper things you find at rest stops along the highway.

Okay. But couldn't they have at least generated a better cover for the pamphlet than the above? Dude just looks like a model with some super futuristic sunglasses on. I mean look how full his lips are. Is he gonna kiss me or arrest me?

But the best part of the pamphlet is the flip side (CLICK TO ENLARGE)...

And, I mean, how is this done?

In Hollywood will you just regularly find these underneath your windshield wiper when you walk to your car back from lunch like most of us would find a promo card for a rave or the newest pizza joint?

I can just imagine Lindsay Lohan getting in her car, driving down Sunset Blvd., and then noticing a pamphlet for the Back To The Future remake flapping in the wind. Then she gets all pissed and turns the wipers on, even squirting wiper fluid on there in hopes to dislodge it before yelling at Samantha Ronson to try and grab it, but then they just giving up and doing coke lines off of some of the vinyl Samantha has in her bag...

I mean, do the residents in Beverly Hills and Malibu walk to the front of their homes and find fliers for The Shining remake jammed into the crease of the door and rubber-banded onto their doorknobs? Is this how it goes down? Say it ain't so, Li-Lo.



Victor said...

The saddest part about reading the pamphlet is that I realized that it's been 20 years since the original Robocop came out.

Fox said...

I always use Nevermind as the baromator for the "holy-crap-I'm-old" moment, or, more accurately, the "holy-crap-I-haven't-done-anything-with-my-life-yet" moment.

Thing is, it just always gets worse... what is it... 16 years now since "Smells Like Teen Spirit"? Just think, there's a whole generation of pre-teens right now that see Kurt Cobain the way we saw James Taylor or David Crosby.

Mandy said...

It looks like it might be more targeted toward companies that would license merchandise rather than movie investores. I don't know jack about investing in movies, but I know a little about licensing, since that's sorta like what I do. And this looks like some kind of pamphlet that I would put out. In fact, I have a pamphlet that I send to potential sponsors.

Oh, and another thing, STOP MAKING REMAKES!!!!!!!!!!!! ARRRRRRGGGGGGGGGHHHHHHHHHHH!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

elgringo said...

Wow...a pamphlet.

This is definitely a film I thought would get remade. But if they EVER try to remake Back to the Future, HEADS WILL ROLL!


Fox said...

Have you heard about the Sunset Blvd. remake?

They are doing a Hairspray type thingy with it. From screen-to stage(as musical)-to screen again(as musical).

Personally I'm still keeping my ears open for that rumor that Madonna wants to remake Casablanca

Fletch said...

I'm gonna invest in a new Quizno's franchise and a new Robocop franchise simultaneously - that way, I can sell Collector Cups at my store for the movie I'm promoting. It's a win-win!!! ;)

Maybe they're just taking a Verhoeven/Starship Troopers route with their advertising. "Would you like to know more?"

bryan h. said...

Hmm, I think whoever put this pamphlet together either hasn't seen, or doesn't get, RoboCop. I'm pretty sure the first film's satire of "cross divisional activity" of "a major consumer products program" was hard to miss.

Fox said...

Fletch & Bryan -

I think y'all are both on to the same sad joke about this whole thing. Can you imagine what Verhoeven would think? I would love to hear it.

It reminds me of that Bud Light sign in Total Recall that's framed in between two actors at a bar. I'm sure Anheuser-Busch and the studio were like "Hell Yeah, product placement!", not getting Verhoeven's joke about "cross planetary divisional activities"

Though I loved Black Book, I would love to see Verhoeven work in Hollywood again.

bryan h. said...

Can you imagine how amazing it would be if they actually got Verhoeven to do the remake?